Crazy adventures of Loran and Lucy
by lolliepops123
Summary: this is co-written with LittleMissShortness x written purely for fun and laughs, read and enjoy :D


"Die you slagger!" screams of vengeance echoed through the bases walls, "run Loran Run! Iron-butt is coming!"  
"Ah, the big fluffy monsters gunner' get us!" Loran screams.  
Lucy freezes from running, "Aren't fluffy things supposed to be cute? And the metal backside is anything butt, LOL get it?"  
Loran's steps falter for just a moment, "Wha- Oh! I get it. Run!"  
"Forest, Run!" screams out Lucy bolting down the hallway, "can't catch me I'm ginger bread man! Wait no woman!"  
Lucy and Loran run through the emptied halls. Then all of a sudden, they come to a halt. Which way do they go?  
"Let's go this way!" Loran yells, running to the right while Lucy runs to the left.  
Lucy freezes and bolts after Loran into the rec room.  
"Man the paint ball guns, we got us a big one!" Lucy screams at Loran, running toward the biggest paint ball gun.  
"But… but I want the big gun." Loran whines.  
"You can't handle the big gun!"  
Loran freezes, "Shuddup!"  
"NEVA!" Lucy grabs the paintball gun and bolts out the back door into the woods surrounding the base.

Rain poured down as Lucy bolted through the first layer of trees, Loran followed closely after clinging to a tiny nerf gun.

Lucy swung around and bellowed out to Loran "This way! The furry freak will never catch us!" Lucy turned back around from facing Loran and smashed into a brick wall.

"OMG, it's the sparkly freaks!... OMG we can have a disco party! Someone stick a light on them!" Lucy jumps up and starts dancing around insanely.

Loran stands back and watches as Lucy starts dancing around a pine tree.

"Uh… Lucy… what are you doing?" she asks. Lucy looks up from her partner, the tree, and looks towards Loran.

"Don't just stand there! DANCE PARTY!" Lucy screams. Loran shrugs and begins to dance insanely along with her, using the beat of the rain as the music.

Lucy freezes and turns to face the Cullen's, noticing Edward standing next to Bella, she bolted towards them and froze in front of them. "Ollo Edwardo, you do realise your gay right?"

Edward growls "How do you know my name? And that was RUDE!"

Lucy shrugs "I speak only the truth and nothing but, you are 120 years old, you sparkle, you're GAY!... Don't forget the lotion, gay man!"

As Edward started forward, Loran came screaming through between them like a maniac.

"NERF GUN, AHOY!" she squeals and then runs off into the distance.

Edward and Lucy stare off after her.

"She your friend?" Edward asks.

"Nope, never met her before." Lucy shrugs.

Just then in the distance, they hear wolves begin to howl and then Loran's loud laugh echoing through the forest.

"OW NO there really are furry freaks around! Loran don't fall for their cuteness!" Lucy bolts after Loran, when a massive blue monkey flings it's self out of the tree.

Lucy freezes "WOWWWW! The smurfs got huge! You do realise that steroids are bad for you right?"

"Howdy mate." The blue monkey thing says.

Loran comes back through the trees, running as if the devil himself were on her tail.

"They may be cute… but they are DEEEAAAAADLY!" She screams and then laughs at the same time.

A pack of wolves ran after Loran, the lead one stops and stares from the blue monkey thing, to Lucy and then at the screaming Loran!

"What ever happened… Loran did it!" Lucy bolts towards the black wolf and springs onto his back.

"Giddy up horsey giddy up!" Lucy laughs and bounces on the wolf's back, freezing when Iron hide came falling through the trees.

"Lucy! Fragging fleshy! My cannon! Hand it ova mate!"

Lucy smirks and flips off the wolf's back, waltzing over to the angered mech.

"Sure thing sugar! You just gotta… catch me!" Lucy laughs insanely and bolts away into the rainy gloom. "Like I said before, I'm the ginger bread.. WOMAN and you can't catch meeeee!"

Lucy ran into the forest, Loran following lazily behind; laughing all the way. It took Iron hide a few moments to realize that the girls were running away and when he went to catch them, he hit a barrier, "What the fudge monkeys?"

Meanwhile, Lucy and Loran were running through the forest when loran tripped over her feet.

"Ah, SAND!" she screamed, struggling to get up. Lucy looks around and see's Loran kneeling on the yellow brick road.

"Follow, follow, follow the yellow brick road!" she began to sing.

Lucy and Loran jumped up and linked arms, singing 'Follow the yellow brick road'. Then, a barking sound came from their right.

"Ah…. FLUFFY MONSTERS ATTACK!" Loran squealed. Then a dog came out of the forest. Lucy looked around but couldn't find Loran anywhere and then she looked back and saw her standing behind a tree.

"Loran, IT IS A PUPPY!" Lucy began to laugh.

"Naaawwwww sooo cutie!" Loran began to coo at the adorable little puppy.

Lucy laughed "Now all we need is a metal man needing a heart…. Owwww Iron hide!"

"Shut your pie hole Lucy! I don't want on my grave stone, 'killed by furry freak on a yellow brick road'." The dog barked happily and bolted over to Lucy.

"Hey look its name tag say's TODO…. Dorothy owwww Dorothy, you forgot something!"

No answer came so the girls continued on down the road, bellowing out 'WE GOT A PUPPYYYY, WE GOTTA PUPPYYYY, EVERYONE BE JELLYYYY, WOBBLE WOBBLE!'

Soon Loran became tired and made Lucy piggy back her.

"Oh, I don't think I can carry you any longer you fatty!" Lucy bellowed. Just then, as if her statement had been heard; they saw a small blue car.

"Broooom! Broooom!" Loran cheered as she jumped down from Lucy's back. Loran ran over to the car and jumped into it. She began pressing buttons and soon the car was lifting up into the sky.

"Ooo…. Car flies!" Loran squealed in delight. Loran started to move the steering wheel and somehow managed to drive the car down to the ground and let it hover in just enough time for Lucy and Todo to jump in. Lucy shoved Loran over in the car and began to drive. Loran was jumping around in the backseat shouting, "NEVVVEEERRRLAND!"

Lucy flew the car over train tracks hoping to land in a field below when the loud scream of a train bellowed from behind them.

"Lookey, lookey it's a chugga chugga Chu Chu train!" Loran screamed happily in the back but then froze and faced Lucy "Holy mother of fudge muffins it's a train! LUCY DRIVE FASTER!"

Giggling manically Lucy hit the pedal and smashed through the wall of a tiny little cottage.

Coughing from the dust the girls stumbled out of the wrecked car and into the cottage.

The dust settled and a figure rose from the dark.

"IT'S THE BOGGY MAN!" Loran screamed.

"NO IT'S THE FURRY FREAK AGAIN!" Lucy screamed back at Loran.

Haggrid stumbled into the light and frowned at the hole in the wall and then noticed the two girls'.

"YOU TWO!" anger was clear in his words. The girl's skin paled slightly.

"RUNNNNN!" Loran screamed and bolted out the hole in the wall, Lucy followed soon after.

Loran and Lucy kept running, not stopping for anything. They ran and ran until Lucy was left running by herself.

Lucy stopped, "Loraaaan?"

Loran made a small squeak from where she was; Lucy looked around on the ground and saw her lying all crumpled up in a small ball.

"What are you doing?" Lucy asked, trying to stifle a giggle.

"I fell." Loran laughed. The two girls began to laugh hysterically. Lucy helped Loran up and they started running again.

The girl's were running and not paying attention to what they passed.

"Oof!" someone said.

"Holey mother of chocolate sprinkles! Thaaaat Hurt!" Loran shrieked. Lucy looked around to see Harry Potter and Ron Weasley staring down at two crumpled figures on the floor. One was Hermione Granger and the other was Loran. Lucy couldn't contain her laughter and soon she was lying on the ground with them; laughing her face off.

"Excuse me, but do you think this is funny?" Harry asked, quite obviously annoyed.

"Yep! Loran's face is all smooshed!" Lucy chuckled. Loran shot her a death glare while she tried to get up but because Loran is a cluts, she ended up falling into Draco Malfoy, who happened to be walking past at the time.

"Oopsies! My BAD!" Loran yelled.

"Potter! Who are these muggles?" Draco said, spitting out the last word.

Lucy stood up to her full height, towering over Draco and said, "Who said anything about us being muggles, dirty little boy?"

Loran lost all self control and began to giggle uncontrollably which then caused Draco to become angrier. Hermione could see the anger building in Draco's face so she tried to lead Loran away, even though she was angry with her.

Loran broke from Hermione's grasp and ran up to Draco and got up all in his personal space, "Nickey, nickey, Na, na. You a fat banana. I took your wand and stole your hat! Lucy, COVER ME BRO!"

Lucy pushed Draco over and skipped away happily with Loran.

When Lucy and Loran were far enough away and hidden somewhere in the school, well actually lost, Loran began trying to cast spells with the wand, "Abra Cadabra! Skip, skip, Caddo. Whip whip, ca boo. Bibbity Bobbity Boo!"

Lucy stared at Loran, "What are you doing?"

Loran shot Lucy a cheeky grin, "Trying to be a magician!"

Lucy nodded her head and went back to looking for a 'secret button' along the wall. The two girls sat there for a few more minutes until they heard someone walking along the corridor. Lucy scrambled up and left Loran sitting in the middle of the walkway. Eventually Loran realised that Lucy wasn't there and someone was coming. She jumped up and hid behind a pillar.

The people walked past; they were a class with wands.

Loran and Lucy jumped out of their hiding spots.

"Owwwie! I got squashed!" Loran frowned. Lucy laughed in her face and then grabbed Loran's arm and led her behind the students.

"Time to learn." Lucy snickered.

"I hate learning…"

Lucy slapped Loran on the arm and they sat down, hiding, and watching the lesson to learn some spells.

When the lesson finally ended, Loran had learnt two new spells; Expeliarmous and Wingardium Leviousa. Expeliarmous gets rid of someone's wand from their hand, while Wingardium Leviousa levitates things.

Loran was trying to catch Lucy; she wanted to levitate Lucy…

Screaming Lucy bolted down the hallway coming to a stop in front of a lab labelled 'potions master'.

Bolting inside Lucy locked the door and stumbled back knocking over multiply jars.

"Hey look domino's, hehe" giggling quietly. Lucy froze when Loran began to bang on the door.

"Luccyyyy ohhh Luuucccccyyyyyyy, I won't hurt you, I'm just gonna teach you how to fly, in the sky, like a birdy!" maniacal laughter could be heard as Loran skipped off.

Grabbing the closest bottle Lucy bolted out the door and followed after Loran, dumping the purple liquid over Loran's head and falling over laughing.

"EVERYONE LOOK IT'S BARNEY!" rolling on the floor laugh Lucy failed to notice when Loran began to grow and grow and grow.

Suddenly Lucy was swept of the floor by a massive hand.

"Hehehehehe, I have a Lucy bear… OMG I'M HUGE… growth spurt much!"

Laughing Loran skipped down the hall breaking windows as she went.

Suddenly Loran begun to shrink, dropping Lucy she stood once again at her original height.

"THERE YOU ARE! GET BACK HERE!" Haggrid bellowed rushing at the two girls.

"OW NO IT'S BACK! RUN LUCY BEFORE THE SMELLY GIANT GETS US!" Loran bolted out a door into the woods, Lucy trailed behind lazily, too tired to sprint.

Suddenly, an arrow whizzed out of nowhere and embedded itself into a tree near Loran's head.

Screaming Loran turned and bolted up a tree.

"WOW! I've never seen her climb so fast…. THAT WAS FUNNY!" Lucy fell over laughing as a brown haired girl leapt into the clearing.

Holding a bow the girl advanced upon the unaware girl laughing on the forest floor.

"Who are you?" shoving the bow into Lucy's face the browned haired girl failed to notice Loran shimmying down the tree trunk.

"Who am I? Well, let me break it down for ya!" Lucy pushed the bow out of her face and jumped up, Loran landing beside her.

A spot light broke out of nowhere and lit up Lucy.

Bling decorated her neck and her pants sagged down, she began to rap.

_My name is Lucy _

_Capital L_

_The queen of hell_

_Get it right, oh yea'_

_I'm fly as a white guy _

_And cooler than you_

_They call me flashy _

_Cause of the blingy bling, yo!_

The spot light moved suddenly and landed upon Loran.

Loran stood posed on the spot, long black jacket and a glistening hat, she raised a red and white candy cane stick and began to dance.

_Da da dadada_

_Da da dadada_

_Da da dadada_

_I am loran _

_Da da dadada_

_Da da dadada_

The brown haired girl stood looking at Loran with a confused expression.

Lucy wondered over wearing jeans and a leather jacket, she flashed a smile.

"That's Loran, she hasn't had her med's yet."

Laughing the girl extended her hand "I'm Katniss, nice to meet you"

Loran skipped over still wear the long black jacket and hat.

"Nice to meet cha'. Where are we?"

Katniss looked perplexed "the Hunger Games."

Lucy nodded and ran off reappearing quickly in camouflaged clothes and holding a set out to Loran.

Loran bolted off behind a tree. The rumble of an engine had Lucy dodging a falling tree as Loran reappeared driving a tank.

The top popped open and Loran, outfitted in pink camo, hopped down from the tank.

Wiggling the keys Loran smiled "I'm driving!"

Lucy flipped onto the tank "I'll man the guns!"

Loran laughed and dropped back into the tank. "No reverse on this thing! It's forward from here!"

Lucy looked at Katniss "Can I stay with you?"

But before she could answer, Loran gunned it outta there, crashing into trees as she went.

"I'm driving, I'm driving, and I'm driving my tank!" could be heard from below as Lucy continued to dodge rogue branches.

Rolling out of the woods, Loran gunned it into the base, running straight over Ratchets foot.

"Fragging, slagging! Little femme I'm going to weld your ass to the ceiling!"

Loran screamed and bolted out of the tank.

"Bumblebee! Spread your wings and fly me away!"

Bumblebee stared down at the screaming Loran, who was trying to climb up his legs.

Then a talk show host's voice rumbled from bumblebee's radio, "Help! She's attacking me…"

Lucy walked calmly towards Loran and began trying to pry her little hands away from bumblebee's legs. When Lucy finally managed to get Loran away, Loran was dusting her hands and clothes off.

"Bumblebee, you're all filthy!" Loran giggled.

"Oh em Gee. Let's have a carwash." Lucy says, flipping her hair and acting like a posh girl from an info commercial.

Optimus stood forward, "Me first."

So Lucy and Loran went and changed outfits, again. This time they were in oddly coloured bikini tops and a pair of denim shorts, each. Loran's bikini top was green with specks of colour flicked all over it and her shorts were light denim. Lucy's bikini top was black, red and neon blue; her denim shorts were dark in colour.

"Working at the carwash! At the carwash, yeah!" could be heard from both sides of Optimus Prime. Lucy was on Optimus' left side and Loran on his right.

Lucy climbed up onto his bonnet and began singing and dancing. Loran, being utterly loopy, decided it would be just hilarious to spray Lucy's feet.

Lucy was talking to Optimus, her back to Loran. Loran began spraying the water from the hose, at Lucy's feet. Lucy started to slip and slide around; she was losing her balance. She gripped tight to Optimus and Loran fell onto the ground, laughing her face off.

"Loran!" Lucy screamed.

Loran was still laughing her face off, rolling around in pain. Lucy had had enough of Loran's antics so she went and threw the sponge at Loran. The sponge landed in Loran's mouth, dirt covering her tongue. Loran quickly spat it out, coughing from the soap bubbles.

"Lucy, really?" Loran squealed, clawing at her tongue.

Now it was Lucy's turn to be laughing except for one thing, she rolled off of Optimus and hit her head. Lucy was groaning on the ground when an explosion happened. Quick as a flash Lucy jumped up and went into a ninja-like pose. Loran was watching for any signs of someone entering the building but there were none and then the next thing she knew she was being flown through the air and landed on top of Lucy.

Lucy pushed Loran off of her and stood up; she looked around and then saw why Loran had been thrown through the air. Thor, the warrior from another world, was in the air above them; looking mighty cross.

"Would you be quiet!" his voice rumbled out like the lightning he controlled.

Loran rose on shaky feet, "Sure, yea, we'll shut up!"

"For disturbing me you must have a payment for me!" thunder rolled behind him, echoing loudly through the base.

Loran smiled and winked at Lucy, fishing around in her pocket, she revealed a card.

"Two for one special at Macca's that do?" Thor floated closer and collected the card.

"Very well." Lightning struck and he vanished from sight.

Lucy laughed and dove for Optimus.

His door swung upon and allowed her entrance into his cab.

Loran sighed and turned to put away the equipment.

Inside the cab, Lucy huddled into the warm leather of Optimus' chair.

Sighing she snuggled up in the warmth and closed her eyes.

"Lucy?" Optimus' voice rumbled throughout the cab.

"Yea?" her voice sounded sleepy as the warm relaxed her body.

"What do you do when you like a person and have no idea how to approach them?" the question took Lucy off guard, sitting up straight she viewed the dash of the semi.

"Many people would tell you different things, I always thought that if you liked a person you should go for it, no use putting it off!"

The cab fell silent as Optimus drifted into deep thought.

"Lucy, what do you think of me?" his voice was quiet, a melody through the cab.

"I think your amazing, strong, compassionate, a leader, and that any girl would be lucky to have you." The sadness in her voice was obvious, but she hoped that he wouldn't pick up on it anyway.

Optimus hummed and reclined her chair.

"Sleep, Lucy, I'll protect you."

Sighing Lucy fell into darkness Optimus' last word's echoed through her mind.

"…I need you Lucy, I've never felt so alive before…."

As Lucy drifted off to sleep, Loran stood, lollypop dangling out of her mouth surveying the base.

Noise alerted her to another presence on the plat form.

"What you up to?" his voice sounded just behind her left ear, breath drifting out to brush her neck.

"I thought you were leaving?" weariness coated Loran's voice, heartache still heavy in mind.

"Not without you." Turning Loran looked into his brown eyes, hair falling lightly across his forehead.

"I made a mistake Loran, I should have never left you!"

Desperation coated every word.

Anger grew in Loran, "Now listen here, Josh Hutcherson…" her words halted as his mouth swallowed her words.

Sighing she gave in.

"LORAN! HELP!" tearing away from him she looked over the railing.

Lucy bolted down the hallway, Indiana Jones following.

His whip cracked out and wrapped around Lucy's ankle.

"GIVE IT BACK!" Indiana screamed as he dragged Lucy closer.

Loran ran forward and gripped a rope.

"HEY INDIANA, LET HER GO!" loran pushed off the railing and crashed into Indiana sending him sprawling on the ground.

"You just got tarzaned, what!" swing her hands, Loran skipped over to Lucy and hauled her up.

"ARRRRRRRR!" a scream echoed over the base to brush against the girls ears.

"I'M GOING TO KILL LORAN AND LUCY!" Ratchets voice echoed out dangerously.

Lucy turned to face Loran, "It never ends does it?"

"Nope!"

Turning Lucy and Loran bolted for the woods.

"ARRRRR THE FURRY BUNNIES GONNA GET US!"

Tune in next time for more crazy adventures with Lucy and Loran :D

THANKS FOR READING!


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